Showing posts with label communication. Show all posts
Showing posts with label communication. Show all posts

Monday, 16 March 2015

Can you hear body language?

Clients frequently challenge the idea that body language makes a difference in telephone communication. It's easy to resolve their challenge. Having worked briefly in a contact centre, I remember the floor being filled with people sending non-verbal signals during every phone call; even though the non-verbals were invisible to the person on the other end of the telephone.

My favourite example to illustrate the point, is to talk about my voice over work. When I record, I'm in a booth by myself. I don't just stand there. I embody the words and convey the message with my whole being. Only my voice will be used, so what I look like is irrelevant. But I do know that if I just stood still my voice would sound different. 

My brother said something to me the other day which was the perfect example. He was talking about a pretty tricky phone conversation and at one point he told me he could "hear the other person raising their eyebrows". This phrase gave me a very clear picture about what was happening in the phone call, even if I didn't have all the details about what was being said. My brother couldn't really hear the other person's eyebrows being raised - I can't imagine anyone having eyebrows that noisy - but he could hear their tone of voice. It's highly likely that the person to whom my brother was speaking was actually raising their eyebrows and this is what influenced their tone of voice.

Next time you're speaking on the telephone, check in with the picture you have in your mind. Most of the time, we "see" this picture unconsciously as part of our interpretation of the message we are receiving. 

You might even go a step further and try this out with a friend or colleague: ask them to adopt different postures (eg slump, stand up straight, smile, frown, check their Facebook page) and then speak. See if you can describe their body language. I've noticed that people are usually pretty good at deciphering the visual channel of face to face communication, even when it's invisible.

What are you conveying when you speak on the telephone? Check your body language. You'll be sending a message loud and clear; just make sure it's the one you intend to send.


Saturday, 14 March 2015

Singing beside the seaside - Airey's Inlet Music Festival

Because of interstate travel this week, I missed my vocal group's rehearsal. It was our last in preparation for two performances at the Airey's Inlet Open Mic Music Festival, taking place this weekend.

I'd been diligently recording all our rehearsals so that I could listen and go over my parts in my own time. I don't usually do this, because I have a piano and just rehearse that way, but I'm not usually booked into the hotel suite that comes equipped with a piano, so did it this way instead.

On the four hour flights to and from Perth I spent the time listening and rehearsing. I thought I was doing it in my head, until the man sitting next to me said nothing, but conveyed, with a look that said, "What the hell are you doing? Please stop bouncing around in your seat!" (This man also failed to respond to the humour being offered with the coffee by one of the flight attendants.)

Vocal Group rehearsal - the devices come out.
© 2015 divacultura
A beautiful day dawned. I stood out in the sunshine waiting for my lift to arrive with my music, doing some last minute reviews. As we snuck around the back of a cafe, right on the highway, to warm up, the passing traffic gave us some strange looks. A lone cyclist looked as though he was about to ride right off the road.

One of the songs we sang is "Waiting on an Angel" by Ben Harper. When rehearsing and thinking about this song I attached it to Andrew Chan and Myuran Sukumaran, the two Australian men awaiting execution in Indonesia. It was all I could do to get through without tears taking over.

If you can get to Airey's Inlet tomorrow, it's worth visiting. There are nine music venues, ranging from marquees in car parks to corners of cafes and gallery spaces. The festival culminates in a performance by a "mystery guest" whose identity is a closely guarded secret.

I was so pleased to be a part of Mood Swing's performance today. Our happy, relaxed vibe created a beautiful exchange with the audience. Singing with and for other people is such a special gift.

Wednesday, 8 October 2014

Mental Health Awareness - it's up to all of us

It's World Mental Health Week and it's great to see and hear so much happening to educate us about mental health.

This week I'm at the College of Mental Health Nurses Conference in Melbourne talking to people about the mental health clinical education toolkit that I've produced for St John of God Health Care. It's giving me the opportunity to meet nurses who are working in all kinds of places but all share one thing - a commitment to quality care for people who have mental health problems. I've met nurses working in hospitals; nurses working in Medicare Locals; community nurses working in cities and regional areas; nurses working in prisons, other forensic settings and assessing asylum seekers . There are also educators from hospitals, other health care providers and universities.

ABC has programmed lots of interesting things under the banner of "Mental As". What a fantastic contribution to the education of our community. I think some of what I've seen can really make a difference to creating supporting understanding and empathy in the community. Monday night's Q & A on television had a panel of people talking frankly about mental health in rural and regional areas. The panel included a psychiatrist, a comedian, a lived experience practitioner (something I've just learned about), a politician and a CEO from a community organisation and the quality of the questions and conversation showed just how much we're thinking about mental health and experiencing in our daily lives. (You can catch up on the show, read a transcript, see the questions posed and learn about the panellists on the website.) It was stimulating television: I was challenged. I was moved. I was educated. I was frustrated. I was angry. I was relieved.

Last night - again on the ABC - the first episode of Changing Minds aired. It takes us inside the psychiatric unit at Sydney's Liverpool Hospital. I regularly visit private mental health hospitals, but am not exposed to the clinical interactions. I see patients walking around and always greet and acknowledge them. I know that my experience is more than most lay people would have, but going inside a public ward where people are sometimes there under the Mental Health Act was a new experience.

The focus last night was on three people who have bipolar disorder and were in various stages of treatment for manic episodes. We saw Patrick towards the end of his stay and then back at home. We met Glen who is up and down. We met Sandra who is at the beginning of her admission showing nasty irritability and disordered thinking. I struggled with my own reactions to these people and admired the good humour and empathy displayed by the staff. Sandra was very suspicious about the medication a nurse was dispensing, initially denying they were correct. She insisted the nurse go through each tablet, explain what it was and then put it in a particular place. I was rolling my eyes from a distance and was so impressed to watch the nurse who patiently and respectfully responded to Sandra's needs.

What I've noticed is that all this conversation really does work against stigma. I believe this is the first step necessary for healing and understanding in our world.

Last night's program has also helped discovery within my own family. One of my family members has bipolar disorder and each of us has our own experience and attitudes as a result of living with this person. I've been open about this in my close circle, but have not talked in the wider world. The raising of mental health awareness has helped me understand that there's value in sharing my experience and insight with others. I have several close friends who also suffer with depression and anxiety. I know from talking to them that understanding isn't always there.

What's your experience of mental health? How are you engaging in the conversation? What can you learn to help understanding of people who have mental health problems?

If you're at the conference why not drop by the Australia Catholic University stand and say hello?


Wednesday, 20 August 2014

What to do when you meet someone famous.

Fame. Infamy. Celebrity. Many people crave these things like air, but I wonder what it would actually be like to be so recognisable that complete strangers think they know you. If your fame is over, then how do you reinvent yourself while the rest of the world sits on the sidelines reacting to you in accordance with their view of who you are and what you're capable of?

I had an encounter today which caused me to ponder these things. (I'm not going to reveal who this person is out of respect and professionalism.) I was playing a character and only interacted with this person while I was in character. I knew the identity of the person I was to work with beforehand so it wasn't a complete shock when I walked in, but there was still that strange moment of recognition. It felt like I knew this person and then remembered the truth. 

The work we were doing together was very far from the field in which this person had achieved their fame; this may have made it easier to forget about who they "had been". 

That idea of "had been" crossed my mind and I thought about how awful it would be to have to fight against an outmoded image of yourself. Reinvention - or even just progress - can be challenging for ordinary people. I can only imagine what it must be like when the world has you boxed into a particular place in that world.

During our encounter, nothing was mentioned of the old world. What a relief that must be!

The bigger lesson from today's experience was a reminder about meeting people as they are, with no preconceived ideas. Being present, interacting in the moment and responding according to how they are today is a good thing to do with anyone.  A deep level of authenticity and honesty is possible if both people in the conversation are doing this.

I'm pleased to have had the opportunity I had today. My only regret was that I didn't have the opportunity to engage with this impressive person as myself. Truthfully, I may have been a little bit star struck when it was all over.

What did you learn today? Who did you meet today?

Monday, 18 August 2014

5:14pm to Laverton

The 5:14pm Laverton train was entertaining. The driver engaged with his cargo. As we pulled out of Flinders Street Station he greeted us and then said he wanted to acknowledge three very special groups of people travelling with us today.

"Firstly, I'd like to acknowledge all those people who gave up their seat to someone who really needed it. The second very special group I want to acknowledge is those who can actually hear what I'm saying. It means you haven't got your headphones on and turned up to eleven, which also means you're not driving everyone else nuts with [insert beat box sounds here] bleeding out of your headphones. And the third group I really want to acknowledge is those who are speaking on their mobile phone very softly. You're all outstanding people.

"I also wanted to let you know we are running a bit late, due to the tardy arrival of this train to Flinders Street. I'll do my best to make up time and get you home, as long as you're going anywhere on the Laverton Line, except South Kensington, where we're not stopping. If you're not going to any of these places, you're on the wrong train and I can't really help you! You should get off at the earliest opportunity."

As we pulled out of North Melbourne station, the train slowed right down. The driver was back.

"Good afternoon again, ladies and gentlemen. Very sorry to bother you again. I think the scenery we're now passing through is really worth having a look at - you know, under the freeway - lovely, the dirty old creek - it's so picturesque I decided to slow right down to give you a chance to take it in."

Some of us laughed.

He explained the train ahead of him was travelling very slowly, so he had no choice but to also drive slowly.

At various points, he also advertised a new bus service (the 901) running from Broadmeadows Station to the airport every 15 minutes and apologised for interrupting our reading.

I like this driver and hope he brings me home again soon.

Thursday, 7 August 2014

On teapots and punctuation

"We had to keep going you know  because I've only got a certain amount of energy available each day," the woman declared too loudly as she boarded the tram.

I looked up to check that she was in fact human. I was expecting something battery powered.

"Mmmm yes well shopping's shopping really isn't it?" said her companion.

They both lacked punctuation when they spoke.

"Yes it is everything is the same it doesn't matter where you go there's nothing new although we did see some lovely teapots only $100 each but then who really needs another teapot especially if you have to pay that much for it."

"No things aren't cheap over here are they $100 for a teapot seems like far too much but they were lovely but you have enough teapots you don't need another one."

I sat pondering the question of how many teapots does one have to have to be declared at that point of "enough"? I also worried that the conversation could involve a detailed, unpunctuated description of the various qualities of teapots.

My stop came and I never found out. My life will go on.

Why do people speak without punctuation? (Although having spent the day reading student evaluations, I could also ask why punctuation is not used for written communication. I think the language in which they write is English, but sometimes I honestly can't tell.)

I have a neat little stainless steel teapot that is perfect to make one sizeable cup of tea. It's round and welcoming and cost me far less than $100. I have the same teapot in a larger size for when there's more than one tea drinker in the house. I wouldn't dream of serving tea bags.

This reminds me of the time I was out with a dear friend and we went to a cafe in Hobart. I felt like a cup of tea, but have learned that assumptions about the quality of tea served must be checked.

After confirming that the establishment served tea, I asked whether they used leaves or a bag.  The girl looked very confused - perhaps conflicted.

"Well, they're leaves, but ... but...they're in a bag?" The upward inflection betrayed her uncertainty.

To stop me from laughing in her face I promptly ordered a cappuccino.

What's the most you've ever paid for a teapot? Do you use a pot or a bag?

Friday, 23 May 2014

Design flaws and "common sense"

Sometimes I wonder how things end up the way they are. It's usually little, simple things. Well they seem simple to me, but evidently they are complex. News of France's blunder with their TFT's (too fat trains) set me thinking again this week.

You'd think you'd check something like the width of trains before you spend lots of money. They've got to fit! Some might even say that doing so is common sense.

This term "common sense" is one that I wrestle with. I actually think it must be a myth. If it was common we wouldn't end up with these kinds of errors. Would we?

On my regular travels through Flinders Street Station in Melbourne I am regularly struck by a piece of poor design. Here's a picture:

Display screens for platform 12 and 13 at Flinders Street Station
© 2014 divacultura
This screen is at the entry end of platforms 12 and 13 at Flinders Street Station. Everytime I see it it sets my teeth on edge.

The first thing you might notice is that it doesn't read in numerical order from left to right. Then you might think that's because platform 13 is on the left and platform 12 is on the right.

This is not the case. Platform 12 is on the left of this screen and platform is on the right of the screen.

If you're not familiar with the layout of the platforms it would be easy to go to the right hand platform to catch the Williamstown train and go left for Sandringham.

The only thing I can think is that they put them in alphabetical order. That's a valid order, but not usually how train stations are laid out.

Would common sense say they should be the other way around?

That's before we even look at the gap between services during peak time.

Monday, 12 May 2014

What I'm wondering

I'm wondering why I keep receiving notification that peak hour train services have been cancelled due to "driver training". Surely there's a better time to train.

I'm wondering why big organisations pass the buck and fail to take responsibility and help customers (ie citizens, the public).

I'm wondering how to extricate myself from a whirlpool of buck passing.

I'm wondering why hotel bathrooms are lit to make me look at least thirty years older than I am.

I'm wondering why caterers think that luke warm water is any way to make a decent cup of tea.

I'm wondering why rice paper rolls marked as "nut free" contained walnuts - the nut to which I'm most allergic. (I can answer this one, partially...because the chicken mix from the sandwiches was used to make the rolls and the chicken mix from the sandwiches contained walnuts. Still doesn't explain the sign.)

I'm wondering why there are still people in the catering business who think that food allergies are not serious, that is potentially life threatening.

I'm wondering why a person who has requested "fructose free" food is served a plate of fruit at morning tea. Sigh. It is marginally better than cake.

I'm wondering why I have to fight so hard to be paid for my services on a regular basis.

I'm wondering why I didn't decide sooner to call it quits with a couple of clients who are bad payers.

I'm wondering why people (ie politicians) don't take responsibility for their decisions to do something different from what they "promised" in the election campaign.

I'm wondering whether there's a definition of "promise" of which I'm unaware.

I'm wondering why people don't listen.

I was wondering why a nurse working in a health care organisation was doing theatre reviews until I realised that I'm the only embedded creative and that her theatre always involves blood, while mine involves blood only sometimes.

What are you wondering about?

* Posts will be erratic this week due to other commitments. *


Tuesday, 1 April 2014

"Sorry" - pondering the art of the apology

Lately I've been thinking about apologies. I think this is partly because the evening news is filled with stories of the day's proceedings at the Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse.

The personal stories are harrowing and I find it difficult to comprehend that what now seems like an epidemic was hidden for so long. The stories are also littered with brave souls deciding to speak up and then being further victimised in the way the institutions responded to the complaint. Often one of the things being sought was an apology. Frequently, the institution receiving the complaint was a faith based organisation. I can imagine these organisations are proud of values like compassion, respect, justice and empathy. Money was usually offered and usually rejected as the apology remained missing in action.

Australia's most senior Roman Catholic, Cardinal George Pell, recently apologised to abuse victim John Ellis. As I watched, I didn't notice what was said because I was so overwhelmed by the fact that he wasn't looking at the person to whom he was apologising. It just looked like a person going through the expected steps, rather than demonstrating any heart connection. (I can't judge intention, but am reflecting on what was being transmitted on the visual communication channel.)

Tonight I also heard that two years ago, the British Prime Minister, David Cameron, apologised to the families of people killed at the Hillsborough soccer stadium twenty-five years ago.

Apologies are so often sought. I wonder at the satisfaction when they are received. What is the essential quality that causes the apology to be received in a way that it goes some way to repair damage and hurt?

Australia has its own long record of grappling with the question of saying sorry to our indigenous people. I could always embrace the idea that one should be offered because it just seemed like the decent thing to do. In February I was listening to the radio in the car, while I drove across town. The show was being broadcast from a concert to mark the anniversary of the apology which was eventually delivered by Prime Minister Kevin Rudd. Kutcha Edwards talked about the wound that indigenous Australians have as a result of the removal of children (the stolen generations). He talked about that when you're wounded you have less capacity to deal with further pain; while ever that wound is left unattended it will fester and ache and ooze and weep. The wound needs to be tended to, so that it can begin to heal.

I listened and the tears rolled. It was the most humble and sensible description I had ever heard.

We know the power of words - to heal or inflict pain - so why is it so hard to say sorry with truth and sincerity? Perhaps it' s the surrender of the ego as wrongdoing is admitted. In order to reach this point, empathy needs to be felt and demonstrated.

Kutcha Edwards also made me rethink my working definition of empathy when the broadcaster raised the family metaphor of "walking in another's shoes". Mr Edwards pounced and said that this was not enough; the understanding needs to be deepened so there is appreciation for why a person is in a particular pair of shoes.

Yes!

I was in Federation Square in Melbourne, as the community gathered together to hear the Prime Minister apologise on behalf of white Australians. I cried. I stood amongst others who were also moved.

Prime Minister Julia Gillard also apologised to mothers and their children who were separated at birth through policies of enforced adoption. It was overshadowed by the internal political shenanigans of the Labor Party at the time, but I remember being just as moved.

It seems we have a lot to say sorry for as a country and probably as individuals too. Have you apologised lately? Perhaps you've received an apology - what made it work? or fail? 




Tuesday, 18 February 2014

A Bruce story and mixed messages from the stadium.

Melbourne was buzzing with Bruce Springsteen stories over the weekend. People were wearing tour t-shirts, old and new, and the name of The Boss could be heard when eavesdropping in cafes.

The Yarraville Festival was on Sunday and before I headed off to see the show, I had a poke around the stalls as there are often some interesting wares to be found. As I asked a stall owner about a dress, she told me that she was very excited because Bruce Springsteen is in town and "everyone is talking about it!" She then asked if she could tell me her Bruce story. Naturally I said yes.

"Well it was a few  years ago and I was at the concert down the front. My boyfriend at the time was six foot four and I'm quite short and was surrounded by really tall people. I couldn't see anything. My boyfriend told me to get up on his shoulders and I did. Anyway, I was there waving my arms around - it was great, I could see everything - and then Bruce paused and started to wave his arms from side to side, then I realised that he was waving at me! I waved back! We did that for about twenty seconds!"

Her excitement over this 20 second exchange was equivalent to the level I would display if I'd been invited for a night cap and a private audience after the show. That wasn't the end of the story...

"And the other day, I came across this video on the internet. It was made by fans, for fans and anyway, I watched the whole thing - it went for about half an hour and then right at the end, there was me waving to Bruce and he was waving back! I reckon they had me there for about 6 seconds! At least I know it really happened!!!"

She laughed as the endorphins surged as she relived the experience. I'd have to call an ambulance if she'd had the night cap.

At the gates to the stadium we went through the usual bag search and noticed that all drink bottles were having their lids removed and anything over 1 litre was being confiscated. I asked why, wondering if was a cynical attempt to boost bar sales.

"Well see that lid?" the security woman held up the pale blue lid of a Mount Franklin bottle of water.

I nodded.

"That's a potential weapon. People were throwing them at Bruce."

Her grim delivery of the message nearly convinced me until I saw the size of the stadium. The world's greatest baseball player would have trouble getting that lid to hit its target. And what kind of fan wants to throw bottle tops at The Boss? A friend later told me that the lids are confiscated so that full bottles of liquid can not be thrown.

As I sat in the stadium before the show began, I noticed all the signs around the stadium.

One sequence that had me puzzled was the invitation to "join the conversation" via this billboard:
© 2014 divacultura
This was immediately followed by severe warnings that photography is forbidden in the stadium. That third icon represents Instagram, the photo sharing social media platform. Most people would obey this sign and ignore the other.

Lastly, there was the sign that said "Text anti social behaviour to [phone number]". The idea of personal safety within a stadium environment is important and while I think it's great to provide a way for people to report bad behaviour, this instruction is very ambiguous. It could mean:


  • I send a text message with the words "anti social behaviour".  What happens next?
  • I could send a message that is an example of anti social behaviour, for example "$#%^ off". What happens next?
  • I could send a picture of someone behaving badly. What happens next?
I suppose what they want is for a text message with details of who, when and where the behaviour is occurring so those fifteen year olds wearing a high-vis vest with the word "Security" emblazoned on the back could receive a message through their ear piece. 

There was no anti social behaviour near me and I resisted the urge to be mischievous by sending pointless text messages.

I hope Bruce wasn't injured by a stray bottle top.

Wednesday, 12 February 2014

Handwriting - what makes a good hand?

There's been some discussion lately about the value and importance of handwriting. My handwriting these days is situational. How it looks will depend on the circumstances of its production. If I'm writing a card or letter (yes, I still do that sometimes) I still use the looping, sloped "running writing" I learnt at primary school; but if I'm scribbling notes to myself, it's a more upright and messy version. Writing on flip charts and white boards, I am told that I have a good, strong hand.

My study of penmanship occurred at a time when class time was dedicated to the practice of letters. Exercise books ruled with blue lines to fit letters between and red lines to guide the length of ascending and descending loops were filled with copies of individual letters. Once perfected, the letters would be joined to make words and those words would be endlessly copied.

I was also subjected to the variations of education systems when state borders are crossed.  In NSW where my career in penmanship began, we were taught Modern Cursive. As the name suggests it was a modernised version of "running writing" - all the loops were removed and the uppercase letters were basically the same as the printed letters, but they leaned to the right. Gone were those beautiful fancy captial efs and kays; the es was stripped of its flourish and the el was just two perpendicular lines. How would that have looked embroidered on Laverne's breast? There was no drama, just function. When I moved north across the border to Queensland, they were still doing a version of Copperplate, a little less fancy than actual Copperplate, and I don't know what it's called, but it was better. There were more loops, swirls and I just liked it. I went wild. (I was also really good at drawing treble clefs, so maybe all that practice just translated to the letters.)

Perhaps I had been influenced by my Grandfather's pride in his own handwriting. From an early age, my siblings and I were encouraged to write letters to our grandparents. I've seen some of my early work, written in pencil, and while the prose is a bit lacking (of the "hi-how-are-you-I-am-well-variety") those letters were legible. The importance of having a good "hand" was impressed upon me early. The character of others could be immediately discerned. Being described in very serious tones as having a "good hand" or a "lovely hand" was far better than being described as being a "tight knitter" or a "loose knitter".The tones describing the latter were doom-laden and accompanied by knowing glances and shaking heads. For example, "Oh, yes, well, you know, she's a very tight knitter. Very tight." Or, worse, "What do you expect? She's a terribly loose knitter you know." They were actually talking about knitting, weren't they?

Of course, back in those days, the ability to write a letter was an essential communication tool; as was the ability for others to be able to read it. Who writes letters anymore? Well I do. Recently I wrote a letter to a friend specifically because he said that no one ever writes him letters anymore. Sometimes I will write a letter to commemorate a special occasion or even just to express a feeling that deserves to live beyond the five minutes after it is emailed or tweeted. Just last year, I wrote a letter to an 85 year old woman in response to the Christmas card she had sent me. She's Jewish and I agonised about whether to send a Christmas card. I should have just written her a letter anyway. It was a lovely letter -full of descriptions of the garden and the visiting wildlife - one I would have been happy to receive, and was pleased to have written.

I have more than a passing interest in typography. This interest was piqued early in my days of journalism study. When we studied print, we learnt about physical layout of type and a page. I'm not old enough to have been composing with metal type and tweezers, but it was still a time, pre-computer software, when the term "cut and paste" was literal. I will soon be attending a workshop which is all about hand lettering. I know I will swoon as I smell the ink and then hear and feel the sound of the pen on paper. It's pleasing to see a page filled with letters, those letters forming words and fitting on the page in a pleasing and easy to read way.

I wonder how my Grandfather observed his own experience of writing by hand. Even his shopping lists were written in the same formal hand. Had he been to university, I can't imagine that his notes would have been scrawled. (He didn't finish high school.)

I'm lucky to still have samples of his writing. I'm sharing with you now, not only his handwriting, but also part of the story of my family, the Fife family from Ireland. Grandfather wrote this piece for a history of the family which was published to coincide with a family reunion in the mid 1990's. I remember him reading it to those gathered at the reunion because, as far as anyone knew, he was the last man alive to know Nixon Fife, one of five children who was sent by his father from Ireland to Australia during the 19th Century famine. As far as I know, Grandfather never owned a computer and probably never even used a type writer.

From my maternal Grandfather, Eric Hilma Brown, who was born  3 July 1912 and died 7 April 2001.





Is handwriting important? How's yours these days?

Sunday, 5 January 2014

Rural health care - or the mysterious tale of the spider bite

Last week I experienced what it's like to go to a GP in a rural town. A large red swelling had appeared on my right leg On New Year's Day. It was hot and had a hard centre. It was painful to walk and seemed to be growing larger by the hour. I tried a few remedies over the course of the day but when I awoke the next day to a bigger, redder, angrier swelling, I decided that I needed to see a doctor.

Firstly, I discovered that one must call in the morning to make an appointment for that day. It is not possible to book ahead. Therefore, making an appointment is like trying to win a competition on a radio station - you just have to keep hitting redial until you succeed in getting through. By the time we spoke to one of the receptionists, only late afternoon appointments were available. In the time taken to give my first name, the slot we thought we were booking for had been snapped up and I was in to see a different doctor at 3:45pm.

I arrived a few minutes early to complete paperwork. It was very hot, so I asked the receptionist where I could refill my water bottle.

She looked at me, puzzled.

"Where can I refill my water bottle?" I repeated.

"We don't do that here," came her mean reply.

"Wow. Really?" was the best that I could do.

I took a seat in the expansive waiting room. I took in the meagre pile of sticky magazines, children's toys spread all over the floor, the blaring television and the miserable looking people and imagined the difference a supply of cool water would make.

Before long a very large man came and sat right beside me. There were so many seats and available places to sit, but he sat right beside me and proceeded to sneeze and cough. I moved. I didn't want to leave the doctor sicker than when I went in!

I  was called in to see the doctor only ten minutes after my appointed time. He took me through and immediately took a past medical history. He didn't say hello and he didn't introduce himself. He asked a lot of questions about my past medical history that had nothing to do with my current problem. It was probably about ten minutes before he stopped typing on the computer, turned to face me and asked what my problem was today! I was appalled. (I know that all my work teaching doctors about empathy and communication probably makes me a tough audience, but really, this was sub-standard.)

I showed him my leg. The expression on his face changed (shock? distaste? fascination?) and he donned some gloves. He pressed and touched and then declared that I had been bitten by a spider. He asked me if I wanted some antibiotics to treat the secondary infection that had resulted and suggested that I take some antihistamines. I reminded him that I take antihistamines daily.

Seconds later I was out the door with a prescription for an antibiotic in my hand and a bill for $70.

By contrast, when I collected my prescription from the pharmacy, the pharmacist wanted to confirm that the tablets were for a skin infection. I showed her the bite. She nodded vigourously and said that she'd seen about five others just like this.

I've been sleeping with an icepack to take the heat out and the antibiotics have reduced the swelling and the red ring of poison. I now have a hard, dark, sore lump on my leg.

It's unlikely to be a Red Back Spider that bit me (I'd be really sick). The consensus is that it's probably a White Tail spider that feasted on me. Avoid this if you can!

Have you ever been bitten by a spider? What's the worst thing you've ever been bitten by? Did you bite it back?

Wednesday, 4 December 2013

Stream of consciousness - musings on journeys and problems and Melburnians.

Today I'm grateful that the most obvious to response to this information: "I'm going to get my hair done." isn't, "Which one?"

That sentence was really quite difficult to punctuate. How did I go?

Every time I have been to the hairdresser in 2013 it has rained on my way home. This is definitely a first world problem.

Speaking of first world problems, the other day I was at Flinders Street Station trying to locate my train (you'd think this would be easier than it actually is). I'd been waiting at Platform 8 for a while. This wasn't random, the signs all pointed to the fact that this was the place for the 5:36 pm to Laverton. A train arrived on the platform. The crowd of waiters (not the drinks kind) surged forward under the impression that the train would be the 5:36 pm to Laverton. As we surged, the sign changed its mind and informed us that it was the 5:40 pm to somewhere else, like Frankston or Packenham. We held back. An announcement informed us that the train on platform 8 was indeed the 5:36pm to Laverton. We surged forward and settled into our seats. "Settled" isn't really the right word. We were unsettled, but I don't know how to unsettle. The sign inside the train suggested the train was going to Packenham or Frankston. People dithered. Who to trust? The written word on a sign that has been wrong before or the live announcement from a human. I assume it was a human. Just as I relaxed in preparation for my journey homeward, an faint announcement was heard outside the train which sent a ripple of anger, a shiver of confusion through the commuters on board who had foolishly trusted the announcement last time. This announcement told us that we were on a train going to Frankston or Packenham and that the 5:36pm Laverton train was now arriving on platform 9! Could we trust the announcement? We surged from the train on to the platform and found a small moustached man wearing an orange high-vis vest and asked him the pertinent question: what the hell is going on? He shrugged in response.

The shrug was like an ember on a stream of petrol. Teeth were bared. We just needed to know which train, where, so we could go home.

Off to one side of the group a woman announced:  "First world problems people! First world problems! Some people don't have a home to go to, let alone a train to get there on. These are first world problems."

That didn't even make sense. As she wasn't getting on any train, but just hanging around the platforms passing moral judgement on people responding to chaos and the cosmic joke that is Flinders Street and Metro Trains at peak hour, I wondered where she was trying to go.

Another man tried to argue to logic of how the 5:40pm train had arrived before the 5:36pm train and it should be ours! I wanted to start singing songs from "Les Mis". I refrained. By that I mean I didn't. I don't mean that I sang a chorus.  Another shrug and he would have hijacked the train and taken us all west. We would have heard the people sing!

Once you're on a train in peak hour there's the added problem trying to navigate overcrowding of the aisles when there are lots of seats vacant. They're vacant because people don't move over and fill the seats furthest from the aisles first. They hog the outside seats hoping to have a bank of two or three to themselves.

I ask people nicely if I may have their seat. They look shocked. Then they move over. I always get a seat.

Then I hand them a tissue because they will inevitably be sniffing the entire liquid contents of their head back into their nasal passages. Repeatedly. What is with Melburnians and sniffing on public transport?

This was a diversion from the hairy, smelly man who was engaging himself in detailed conversation this morning on the way into the city. I didn't mind the conversation, but the smell was hard to take in closed quarters.

Then I heard that the baby elephant born at the Melbourne Zoo nearly a year ago died overnight. I never met Sanook but I had watched a documentary about the elephants at the zoo. I felt sad.

The rain fell, providing a sympathetic background of Shakespearean proportions and a mechanism to negate the efforts of my hairdresser.


Sunday, 20 October 2013

All the world's a stage.- including the hospital ward

Here's what my office looked like on Friday:

My favourite workspace
© divacultura 2013
I spent the day lying in bed and receiving bad news, repeatedly.

Sometimes I was required to react angrily and other times I was directed to be shocked or disbelieving. Usually I reached the point of tears, depending on the interaction with the particular doctor.

Students (practising surgeons) were receiving feedback on their communication and ability to manage emotions. Generally they did very well. What struck me during the debriefing was how sincere they were about wanting the best outcome for their patient (me). Where a mistake had been made, they were appalled on my behalf.



Wardrobe and special FX done.
© divacultura 2013

In the debriefing after scenarios where I had been directed to be angry and was introduced to the students by my own name, some of them looked a little wary. I always wave and smile and introduce myself in the friendliest way possible to prove that the threat is gone. Once they realise this, I notice many of them looking at me, fascinated. Only a moment before I was lying on a hospital bed, the day after my operation, attacking them and wanting to find someone to blame; yet there I am, moments later, looking and sounding completely different.

I love this work!

One of the students had a lovely way of contextualising each piece of information he provided. He explained afterwards that we all come with stories - the patient, the doctor etc - and that each event or interaction adds to that story. I loved his way of thinking. He was wonderful to talk to - empathetic, respectful and caring.

Wardrobe and makeup was really easy. Hospital gowns are the least flattering garments on the planet, but they ARE comfortable. The bandage on my arm is to keep my fake IV in place and I have a hospital bracelet to make sure I'm identified correctly as the simulated patient.

As in life, my simulated husband's presence was repeatedly requested by the doctors. My simulated husband was not there when I needed him. He was running his simulated business but was going to pick up the simulated children from school and come in later in the day.

Everytime I cry during these jobs, I receive questions about "how do you do that?" I now borrow my friend's response: "How do you do surgery?"

In my line of work, all the world IS a stage and they don't call it an operating theatre for nothing.



Thursday, 19 September 2013

My favourite gig OR why I was being paid to lie in bed and wear pyjamas.

"I can't believe that you don't have a brain injury!" Ordinarily these words might be an insult or cause for concern; today they were the best compliment I received all day. Today I was being a simulated patient in a ward with three others and a mannequin.

The patient had fallen off a ladder and now had a brain injury. Such a simple thing and suddenly this woman is confronting a completely changed life. Her walking, eating and cognitive function is affected. After my recent mishaps (the bag falling on my head and my knee injury) I have new perspective on the fragility of being okay and fully functioning in the world.

Be careful on ladders!

This week I've been working with different groups of students across the full spectrum of healthcare. Saturday and Sunday was the gynaecologists and obstetricians; Monday and Tuesday it was mental health nursing; Wednesday I was working with orthoptics students; today was nursing, physiotherapy, occupational therapy, social work, nursing and medicine and tomorrow, international medical graduates. It's such a privilege working with these students as they develop their skills and identity within their chosen field. Mostly they are excellent - really interested in people and ready to help; occasionally I notice that they've already lost their empathy.  I think it's because they focus on skills and knowledge and forget there's a person at the centre of it.

Yesterday was the first time I've worked with orthoptists. They come with a lot of equipment and have spent their time practising their technical and clinical skills on each other.  I noticed that many of them didn't explain what they were going to do before they approached the simulated patient. They would just lean over and peel the simulated patient's eyelids back and wonder why there was  a reaction. The were great with equipment and not so great with the people. I asked if any of them had ever suffered the complaint that the simulated patient had (double vision).  None of them had. I asked if they had considered what it would be like to have double vision. None of them had. I asked them who drove to university that day. Sadly most of them had. I asked them how they would have made their way to university if they had double vision. They started to think about life from the patient's perspective. Here was the "ah-ha" moment.

A few of the nursing students today had already developed what I call "nurse tone". There's a particular brand of condescension - talking overly loudly, slowly and using terms like "we" when they mean "you". I really hate that.

Working as a simulated patient has made me a better real patient. Talking to my GP the other day about a referral to a specialist, she asked me what kind of doctor I wanted. "A good one" was my response. She asked me if I was okay with someone who is very direct. Initially I said yes, but then I pictured myself in conversation about my particular issue with a very direct person. I realised exactly what I wanted AND what I didn't want: "I want to be a person, not a [insert body part here]." My GP selected a different doctor for referral.

I'm not sure I would have had the awareness of being a body part, or an illness before working as a simulated patient.  Many times I turn up to play a role and am not referred to by my own name, let alone my character's name.  Instead we gather to cries of "Lungs in here!", "Cancer in room three!" and "Depression follow me to the basement!". So the rot has started to set in as administrators and educators strip the person from the situation and turn us all into cases.

I push back, not moving until I'm referred to by one of my names. I correct people who say they've been happy to "use me" as a simulated patient, suggesting instead, it's a been a pleasure to work with them.

It's wonderful that health care education now gives students the opportunity to work with simulated patients as a proxy for real patients.

Spending the afternoon lying in bed, wearing pyjamas and talking to enthusiastic young people is a gig I love!

Friday, 12 July 2013

What did you say - the case of the poor listener and the cafe patron.

THE SCENE: Ordering lunch at a cafe today.

Customer (me) walks in to cafe and looks in the cabinet with all the rolls and sandwiches waiting to be selected.  Customer sees the delicious Reuben sandwich on sourdough and waits to be served.

Five staff stare from behind the counter.

STAFF MEMBER:      Oh hi.  Did you want something?

ME:                               Well yes.  Do you toast those?

(points to delicious Reuben sandwich on sourdough)

STAFF MEMBER:       We can, but personally I think they're better fresh.

ME:                               Great.  I'll take your expert advice.  I'll have that here with a cafe latte please.

STAFF MEMBER:       So we have a lunchbox special...for $15 you can have the sandwich, a coffee and a piece of cake or slice.

ME:                              No thanks.

STAFF MEMBER:     It's a good deal - are you sure?

ME:                               I don't eat sugar.

STAFF MEMBER:    No one "needs" sugar.

(Blank look from customer)

STAFF MEMBER:  Didn't you say you don't need sugar?

ME:                          No.  I said I don't eat it.

STAFF MEMBER:  Oh, wow.  (Pauses)  So is that to take away?

ME:                          No, I'll have it here please.

STAFF MEMBER:  And did you want a coffee with that?

ME:                          Yes please - cafe latte.

STAFF MEMBER:  That will be twelve dollars please.

(Customer hands EFTPOS card over)

ME:                          That's on savings thanks.

STAFF MEMBER:   And what account is that on?

ME:                          Savings.

STAFF MEMBER:  Would you like your receipt?

ME:                          Yes please.

STAFF MEMBER:  Would you like your receipt?

ME:                          You just asked me that.

STAFF MEMBER:  Did I?   (pauses) What did you say?

ME:                          Yes please.


As I took my place at a table, I wondered whether I would receive my food and if food did indeed arrive, what kind of food would it be? Would it be in a takeaway bag or on a plate?

A classic case of poor listening.  

The food arrived and it was nice.  The coffee was great too.  Now, just need to sharpen up the communication skills.

How well do you listen?  Do you go onto autopilot?


Tuesday, 28 May 2013

Hanging out at hospital

Lately I've been hanging out in hospitals, walking past hospitals and thinking about hospitals.  I'm fine, by the way.  I've been working as a simulated patient, managing a mental health simulation project and often grabbing a coffee and sandwich in the cafeteria.

Walking through the ground floor of the busy Alfred Hospital in Melbourne I'm struck by being amongst the walking wounded.  There are people on crutches, arms are in slings, people have tubes in their nostrils, they trail drip stands.  Walking outside, there is usually an array of people assembled out on the footpath smoking.  Today I saw a woman sitting at the tram stop wearing a pink dressing gown.  She had a tube going into her nose and she had to move the tube out of the way so she could put her cigarette in her mouth!  With the weather becoming cooler as we approach winter, I was surprised to see a man standing in bare feet, wearing nothing but a hospital gown out on the footpath getting his fix.

The other thing that is noticeable is the incredibly detailed conversations people have on their mobile phones in lifts and hallways.  Today I travelled six floors with a woman who was describing her potential liver failure and the fact that the doctor is recommending extreme changes to her diet to avoid the need for diabetes medication and that all of this needs to happen before surgery could be considered.  Her tone suggested that she could have been booking a carpet cleaner or organising her car for a service.  I looked at her again - she did seem to be a funny colour.

Having spent the day working with paramedics (being a simulated patient and giving feedback on their communication) I then visited the Medicare office to lodge my claim for some recent medical expenses.  The place was packed!  I had to squeeze into a space between two people who looked like they had been there for a while.  After five minutes the voice of the automated queue lulled us into calm - "A123 go to counter 4".  I had A 138 so it would be a while.  Twenty minutes to be exact.  There were ten counter bays and there were staff at three of them to begin with.  After a while, closed signs went up at two of the bays and the voice of the automated queue fell silent for ten minutes.  Then two people came back and things started moving again.

An older man expressed a lack of patience for waiting.  Two people with exotic accents asked when is a quiet time to come back and how long would they have to wait.  Someone was told it would be four weeks before they would receive their Medicare card.  A good looking man wearing a jumper with the logo for King Kong the musical came in - one of the dancers claiming for a work related injury?  Largely people sat in silence and played with their phones.

A138 was called to counter number 4 and within 90 seconds my claim had been lodged and I was being advised that the money would be in my bank account tomorrow.  Surely there's a way that could be lodged online?

This week is a week of health care education: today was the paramedics, tomorrow is mental health, Thursday I'll be trained in the role I'll be playing i upcoming medical exams and on Friday I'll be at the College of Surgeons working with healthcare educators who are learning about working with simulation as a teaching tool.

In the meantime, if you want to watch people and contemplate the frailty of human existence, the hospital cafeteria or hospital footpath are rich with examples.

How's your week looking?

Thursday, 23 May 2013

Staying true in stormy seas - what's your mindset?

One of the things I often have to do when I'm facilitating is challenge people's thinking.  Depending on the person, the response can vary widely.  Some people will understand that the "poke" is designed to get them thinking, while others will react to the discomfort they feel.  Some of these people will react strongly and fight back.

I find the latter reactions are more common than the former. As my experience as a facilitator has grown, I've noticed that I'm quite comfortable challenging people and stay calm and focussed even when I'm being attacked.

Over the last two days I've been working with a group who were not used to being challenged.  It looked like their expectations of training courses was that they would be lulled to sleep by endless power point slides and they would walk out two days later pretty much unchanged by the experience.  The conversations I facilitate are not like that at all and the first day can be bumpy!

At the end of today, I was pleased to hear the changes in people's thinking.  One participant unexpectedly said that he appreciated being challenged and admired the way I had held the frame even when under attack from the group.  Music to my ears!

I've been thinking about how I do this.  I've realised that my mindset is everything.  Here's what I've observed:

1. I'm there to challenge and provoke thinking while keeping everyone safe.

2. My role is not to be liked and be friends with everyone in the room.

3. I am not part of the group; I am in service of the group.

4. Moving out of one's comfort zone is necessary for learning to occur.

5. Adults know what they have to do and know the answers.  The conditions just have to be right for them to discover this or make decisions to act.  My job is to create and maintain those conditions - they're going to be different for everyone.

6. My job is to support people to think.

As a fairly fast paced extrovert, one of the things I have to be vigilant about is that I'm adjusting my pace to allow slower paced people or introverts time and space to think and then answer.  Once my pace is adjusted, I need to work on staying present in the conversation (rather than thinking about how the person needs to hurry up, for example).

It's so satisfying when people highlight what they discovered.  Often they will thank me for that poke or prod I gave them that shoved them out of their comfort zone.  It's then that I am reminded that staying true in the stormy seas was the gift that I gave to the group.


Monday, 25 February 2013

Pondering artists' impressions and corporate gobbledygook

After dinner on Saturday evening, I walked with my friend to the Yarraville train station.  As we crossed the tracks, a man came towards us.  I was cautious until I noticed the police van parked nearby.   There had been an assault in the vicinity on the previous Sunday morning and police were seeking information.

We were shown an artist's sketch and asked we recognised the man.  This is the first time I've been directly asked this question.  I've seen pictures on television, but it felt more significant when asked directly.  I carefully studied the picture.  I needed to get past my initial idea that it wasn't a real person - it's the idea of a description of a person.  Then I said that I didn't recognise him.  I also studied the picture because I wanted to be able to recognise him if he's buying milk at the supermarket.

After leaving my friend to catch his train back to the city, I walked back to where my car was parked on the other side of the tracks, feeling cautious and self-conscious about the fact that I was walking alone.

I think it's an amazing skill to draw someone from someone else's description.  How do you get specific enough in the description to come up with anything other than a picture of a generic humanoid?  Whenever I have been asked to describe someone (or myself) it seems to be a list comprising gender,  hair colour and style, eye colour, height and clothing, which is fleeting.  I'd love to know how the artists do it.

*****

On a different subject, I was bathed in corporate speak this morning while I was on a job.  People were seriously saying things to me like:


  • We're looking for an uptick on that.
  • Let's circle back on that.
  • What's your value add?
  • I understand the customer service value proposition.
After a while I found it hard to concentrate.  These meaningless strings of words washed over me as I struggled to understand.  And this was the biggest problem - the fact that it was up to me to decode the message being sent.  

Whatever happened to plain, direct communication?  What the hell is an "uptick"?  Is it one word or two?


I thought about a police artist trying to sketch a suspect in a situation where that suspect worked for a big corporation and spoke Manager.

"He was a senior leader who understood the value proposition of customer service.  I liked him.  He gave me an uptick on my appraisal and on passed the news to his leader who circled back and value added with me. Yeah, I liked him."

"..."

"Oh, he was 180cm tall, brown hair, brown eyes, looked after himself, you know? Sharp suits."

Tough gig.

Tuesday, 19 February 2013

What's the point of all this feedback on myki?

I'm on the customer experience panel for the myki ticketing system.  My motivation for spending time on this is that I am a committed public transport user. I believe in contributing to my community to make things better.

Each week I try to participate in all of the tasks requested.  I dedicate my time to this and take it very seriously, participating sincerely and honestly.

Sometimes I feel like I'm beating my head against a wall, as changes seem to take such a long time to be made. Sometimes I wonder if changes ever will be made.  The wheels turn very slowly.

Public Transport Victoria regularly provides news and updates in response to our feedback. Most of the time it's unremarkable. Occasionally I read something and think "oh, I'm glad they fixed that!".  This week I just sat and shook my head.

Not long ago we had specifically been asked about how myki calculates fares and applies defaults. Apparently the panel's feedback must have suggested that the rules are complex and hard to understand. The essence of the message provided back to us was there's plenty of information about how it's done and here are all the places where you can read it!

Or on the subject of most people preferring to top up at a myki machine, their response was to tell us they will be launching a campaign to tell everyone about the other ways.

Perhaps out of context some of the impact of these communiques may be lost, but I worry that they are missing the point. If the default position is to defend the system as it stands, rather than thinking about how customer concerns could actually be addressed, I can not see how any aspect of the system will be improved, or what the point of the whole exercise is.

One of my friends today thanked me for continuing to engage with the underperformers who are running Victoria's public transport, saying I'm doing everyone a favour.  I'm no longer sure about that because the result seems so lacking.